


The Devil Does Fall (Into 10th Grade)

by morningstar921



Category: Paradise Lost - John Milton
Genre: And so are his friends, Gen, High School AU, pls don't take this seriously, satan is a preppy punk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-04 20:19:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18819985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morningstar921/pseuds/morningstar921
Summary: High School AU, wherein Mister God expels Satan and Co. from their private school for getting into mischief. Understandably, they aren't very pleased about this.Only covers Book 1 of Paradise Lost (as of now). Written in blank verse like the original work. I can only hope Milton himself would be bemused by this (he probably isn't).





	The Devil Does Fall (Into 10th Grade)

Of their first disobedience and the  
Lurid mark of shame coiled like serpentine  
Seduction about their wrists, iron cast  
Shackles made for captivity to the  
Banishment, they find themselves, Adam and  
Eve, beholden to unhallowed shadow --  
To the paltry Snake who so diminished  
The glory of Heaven High and (hallowed  
Be thy name) its most righteous principal  
Mister God Himself. Appear, and speak, oh  
Muse of the most divine order, so that  
Of this I may so rightly here conclude  
Everything from beginning to the end,  
Of what horrid things Satan Morningstar,  
The Snake, compelled his peers to commit to  
Action, of what frightening influence he  
Gathered in the basement of Hell High School  
Where he fell to from so high up in his  
Previous riches and grace (from great wealth  
In the private school to great dishonor  
In the public sector, what tragedy),  
To make fools of Adam and Eve, God’s best.  
Never wise be it to question the rules  
Laid down by one’s creator -- high school shapes  
A man and molds a woman, folds out the  
Creases of sin and sully, spins safety  
And salvation out of once-spoiled skin;  
And I may proudly state: Mister God my  
Savior wise be the keeper of us all.

On the first day of classes at his new  
School, at his new revoltingly filthy  
School, Satan remarks to himself, “This is  
A hole in the ground, cockroach-beneath-God’s-  
Boot kind of school, ill-fitting for children  
Of parents in high esteem or wealth. To  
Be mixed with the monsters born miser’bly  
To Hell’s halls is an utmost affront to  
His status and intelligence. Satan  
Thinks darkly, “May Mister God weep for the  
Mistake he has made here today.” Satan  
Pulls himself tall, shoulders squared, and marches  
Through the front doors of this wretched new place.  
He soon finds a familiar face amidst  
The vile horde of native studentry. 

Here now standing in the halls of his new  
School under burning lights reflected like  
flames off waxed linoleum floors, he broods.  
Turning to friend and accomplice-in-crime  
Beelzebub, Satan speaks: “I hate it here.  
Who does that old man God even think he  
Is, expelling me and you and all the  
Others for mere rule bending? Casting us  
Out to Hell High, this awful place, for small  
Disagreements in policies? The nerve.”  
He speaks in vague terms of cutting classes,  
Harassing other students and blatant  
Disrespect towards all of their teachers.

And Beelzebub replies rather quickly:  
“I agree, I can’t say I like being  
Here -- private school is nicer than public  
School -- but Mister God will never forgive us,  
And how could we ever earn our way back?  
He’s too powerful, and we’re just too weak.  
Here, in Hell High, that’s where we belong now.”

Satan gets a sharp glint in both his eyes.  
“Nonsense,” he says easily, all anger  
Smoothed out, “there may be no way to earn our  
Way back into Heaven but surely we  
Can knock God down a few pegs, make him squirm  
In his humiliation and weakness.  
It is just a matter of how and when.  
It is the mind that makes truly awful  
The places you are cast, and I intend  
To make hellish the hallways of Heaven.”

And so the two set off through the twisted  
Corridors of Hell to find the rest of  
Their delinquent cabal. They pass hulking  
Hideous nerds hunched over scribbled work,  
Push through a horde of young whores in make-up  
Obnoxiously smeared on, and trudge over  
Burnouts collapsed in piles of smoke and  
Loose, lazy limbs -- the monsters of Hell High.  
In the cafeteria they find their  
Friends gathered, one large mass of preppy rich  
Kids displaced between old, molding public  
High school walls. There is Moloch sat grim-faced  
On the edge of a grimy tabletop  
In the argyle vest his mother made  
For him last winter to match Heaven High’s  
Uniform policy but torn at the edges  
To make his mother weep -- he never did  
Quite like the uniform policy, nor  
Did he ever enjoy making his mom  
Proud; Heaven was just symbolic status.  
Beside him, the fearsomely sensual  
Thammuz, strong-jawed and alluring to all  
The girls at school, who used his mighty looks  
To win favors most chief of which was to  
Pawn his homework onto these hapless fools.  
And beside him too appeared Belial,  
A drunkard on the weekends but a true  
Studious fellow on school nights; armed with  
Sharp intellect, his wit knew no real match.  
Armed with many upon many strong, smart,  
Punky preps at his side, Satan was more than prepared  
To at once begin discussing revenge;  
But there is disagreement in the ranks.

Satan speaks boldly, his back turned to the  
Windows where from a burst of light shatters  
Around him like a halo, majestic  
Yet dev’lish when cast in backlit shadow.  
He says, “ Something must be done about God.  
He cast me out -- he cast us out -- and I  
Won’t abide the shame it brings to our names.  
Our parents paid good money to send us  
To Heaven; this public school is worthless.  
So what do I suggest? Simple: revenge.”  
Tall and proud, Satan stands, their proud leader. 

There echoes a sea of approval but,  
From a few wary faces, misgivings.  
And in pandemonium there was a  
Council held, wherein Satan commanded  
His peers, “Speak freely ideas of action.”  
Into an uproar these dev’lish fiends fell. 

\--End of Book One---  
\--To Be Continued, Maybe--


End file.
